Monday, June 23, 2008

Local Hero Thwarts Neighborhood Parking Bully

Controversy on the cul-de-sac isn't anything new to the headlines. The hotly contested, bi-car-length strip of curb has a sour history of vehicular abuses, and it has in recent times become the center of parking instability and unrest in the troubled Park Grossmont residential district.

Some readers may recall during late 2007 when a GMLH investigative report first brought to light the parking atrocities that had occurred here. Our investigation got results, and an improperly parked SUV was ultimately displaced, following months of oppression. At the time, there was optimism that parking peace was restored, but recently, that optimism has faded.


The trouble occurs during late afternoon, when residents are returning from work to a mostly empty cul-de-sac. In recent weeks, GMLH editors have observed that the owner of a Suburban-type vehicle often arrives first, and does his best to park in the exact center of the parking area. When so positioned, there is no room to park any normal four-wheeled vehicle on either end of the girthy 'burban. A primo parking space is thereby available when a priviledged friend arrives shortly thereafter, and the Suburban is moved back a few feet... unless somebody comes along before then, with determination and a very short wheel-base. This is what you can see happening in the picture above.

To recapitulate, the cul-de-sac region has been long prized by the native motorists. When positioned properly, up to two (2) vehicles may be parked simultaneously on the cul-de-sac with ease. It's proximity to the housing units equates to shorter walks from car to apartment at the mercy of to the vicious raw conditions of the San Diego climate. It's also under the light of the neighborhood security lamp; this provides the peace of mind of knowing that your car will be burgled only by bold, confident and/or very high car thieves.

These advantages aside, it is just like any other section of a street, and the Bari Ct. cul-de-sac has always been available on a first come first serve basis. For now, one resident seems to have found a way to save parking for other members of his household, but tonight, our neighbor with the manuevarable Nissan Versa has taken a stand against parking tyranny.

4 comments:

Kevin said...

I like your reference to the truck as being "girthy".

George said...

Boo. Deadarm. Contempt, scorn, disdain; general disapproval.

Kevin said...

Don't you boo me, pal. You wrote it.

Jonny Bartsch said...

This is like an intelligent version of "the Onion."