Talking to Myself About Bad Writing Technique

Q: How come you are writing in this hokey Q&A format?
A: Oh, that's just a gimmick I use when I'm not up to the task of constructing full paragraphs, expressive of coherent thoughts. It distracts the reader from the content's inadequacies.

Q: You do realize that's not your own original idea, right?
A: Of course! Two sports writers prominent amongst my readership do this all the time. It wasn't even my idea to spoof the format. Stole that too.

Q: So, who is supposed to be asking the questions?
A: I guess it's me writing down a conversation with myself. When Terry Pluto does articles like this, it always makes me wonder if he is lonely.

Q: Do you have some sort of problem with Terry Pluto? He's a good guy, and I don't understand where all this animosity is coming from.
A: I'm not sure where it comes from either; I admit that it is unprovoked.

Q: Ok, but you're right. Those Q&A articles are a disgrace.
A: I know! I know! And he's been defiling Northeast Ohio's newspapers with them my whole life! Something should come out of his salary every time he submits one.

Q: Yeah!
A: (chuckling)

Q: (unable to come up with anything, presented with this unexpected conversational stall)
A: So, I went to a Padres game the other night.

Q: Good for you.
A: You should really be ending your sentences with question marks to make this flow better. You're the one with the "Q:" in front. This would be a good time to maybe ask a question about the Padres or something.

Q: Can we switch?
A: I don't think Pluto ever does that... but I guess we can try it.

A: This is weird.
Q: And more difficult than I expected.

A: (clearing throat)
Q: Oh right. Um, so how about those Padres?

A: Well, for one thing, the Padres camouflage alternates are the best jerseys in sports today.
Q: What makes them so great?

A: They are great because they simultaneously promote three things that make life good. This jersey is a threefold physical representation of Catholicism, the US military, and baseball.
Q: Great point. Alright, changing the subject, why hasn't there been any content on this blog lately?

A: That is an excellent question!
Q: And that was not an answer.

A: Yeah, but that wasn't a question. You cheated.
Q: This is getting ugly. Time to wrap it up?

A: Yes.